This writer really says it well:
“I can’t figure out what it is about you that keeps me around, either. I put 120 percent into the relationship, while you put in a mere 40 to 50 percent, on a good day. But I still stay hanging around.
I keep holding on. I keep telling myself things will get better, that you do care about me. I tell myself that you have a hard time showing affection. I tell myself that you show you care about me in different ways, even though I’m not entirely sure what those ways are. I keep twisting things in my head because I didn’t want to accept not having you in my life.”
And that’s the worst part. When we make excuses for people who don’t trouble themselves to excuse their own behavior to us. The minute we start making excuses is the minute you have to stop and question what is happening, and whether this is the same person you valued so much.